While it is OK to start with the worst assumption of a terror attack, I hope sanity prevails and we also consider the perspective that it is a (debatably) novel way of protesting by a set of smart but disgruntled youth and we give them what they deserve: a dialogue with the powers that be, a chance to understand why they are going through what they are going through, what is being done to get the economy to a stage where equitable growth becomes a key metric. If this can trigger a broader dialogue and solutioning for the youth, this would be a watershed moment for the country.

Highest level of leadership skills are required to be able to muster the courage and see this event in this way. Anything less, and it is very likely we will see a variation of “Rang De Basanti”, the iconic hindi movie where the characters get influenced by Bhagat Singh and decide to speak up against the corruption and injustice they see in the system which got their friend killed, and kept stepping up till all of them are killed because it was easier to kill them, and much harder to answer their questions or address their concerns (of course, it is a movie, so it had way more drama than this!).

Crisis shows the true leader, and I am waiting to see it – in executive, in judiciary, and in legislature.

How does the judiciary respond – does it go along merrily with the UAPA charge against them and let them languish in the jail, or do they hold the police accountable to a timely and swift resolution and get these youth back to where they belong – amongst the concerned citizens?

How do parliamentarians see it – an opportunity to corner the government of the day (or defend, depending on which side you are on), or a time to introspect and work together to solve the problems raised here through conversations and effective policy-making?

How does the executive see it – an inconvenient situation showing them in bad light, or a reminder of inefficient processes that need to be addressed with citizen’s participation and support?

However, the most important indicator is, how does the prime minister see it – an inconvenient truth that puts a blemish on a stellar image of the country and needs to be dealt with with iron hands? Or a moment to show highest form of leadership and endear himself to the youth of the nation – forgive them for their youthful indiscretion and inviting them to a have a dialogue about the problems they see and the challenges they don’t see; showing them that highest form of leadership is about courage, about showing care, about engagement, and not about clenched fists and cloaks of invincibility?

How the events unfold in this saga will tell a lot about the democracy we are, the leaders we have, and the India we build.

I hope we will look back to this moment and be able to say that a Gandhi-inspired protest on Dec 13, 2023 changed the course of the discourse in the country and created the great nation we are and we deserve to be.

Image credit: IMDB

GPS guided us almost to the exact place. When we were about 200 m away, we asked for directions to the city palace. The person assumed we were asking for Sariska City Palace (which was about 29 kms from there!). When we clarified, he pointed us to a turn an asked us to park in the district court parking area. We entered the court parking area, enjoying the fact that our visit to the city palace would be smooth after all since there was no visitor in sight.

When we asked the parking boy which way to city palace, he was bemused and pointed us to enter the district collector’s office!

Only then we realized something that was so obvious: the city palace had been taken over by the government and being used as offices – and of course the primary occupant was the district collector of Alwar! No wonder so many wires were hanging around, and so many official notices and warnings on the city palace wall.

When we entered, we got lost trying to figure out which way to the palace because all the markings were for DC’s office. Finally we could reach the courtyard of the palace.

Yes, this is the courtyard! You can see the beautiful palace rooms in the background, but your eyes get attracted by the cricket match, the ugly coolers fitted on the wall, and the bikes parked along the other wall. There was some serious cricket going on, with a good batsman on the crease (Google thinks this video is not safe so you may have to disable safety mode):
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8xI1EikRAU]
The palace is very beautiful.

But then..

It left me shocked. How could we do this to such a historic monument? Then I realized something more tragic, and my heart sank: this was being done by the government machinery, in broad daylight. I wondered how the locals allowed such a thing to happen and I tried to google if there were any protests to this act. I couldn’t find anything, which was strange too! Of course, in the maze of these offices, I totally lost the interest to track down the museum that is supposed to be somewhere within the palace.

So what can I do about it? Not sure, but I do want to do something. This post is the first step towards it. My first draft of this post was a rant against the govt. but then I realized it can’t achieve anything, and hence I just put the pictures and the video. Thoughts on how to try and affect some change in this state are much appreciated.

If I head north instead, I reach Grand Venice Mall, which is supposed to be “Modern India’s first mega tourist destination”, whatever it means!

Continue north for a few more kms though, and you hit a huge green plot bang in the middle of sectors.

We discovered these plots a few months ago. They were selling garden fresh vegetables right near the road. My wife asked to pick her vegetables from the field herself, and the gentlemen obliged, though a bit surprised at the request.

Kids had great fun too. They spent more than an hour trying to walk on the plot dividers, taking random turns while maintaining balance, and getting excited about where they ended up! They also enjoyed looking at lush green vegetables, playing with the farmers’ kids, and eating coriander leaves right off the farm! Wholesome entertainment and it was hard to get them off from there.

We talked to the farmer and his family and asked them about how such a plot existed. It turned out someone let them use the land for farming till the time the construction didn’t start (in return of money of course!). So we wondered how long they would be around, and they were not sure either. But quickly we moved to more interesting topic for discussion – it was carrot season and they were expecting a good harvest of carrots next month. We promised we would be back for carrots. They threw in a large bunch of coriander for free, and refused to take money even when we insisted.

We were excited – getting farm fresh vegetables, at below-market prices, offering entertainment to my kids (who hate grocery shopping!), and giving me satisfaction that what I pay for the produce is going directly to the producer. It felt too good to be true, and we wanted to make the most of it while it lasted. We wanted to come again, soon.

It was too good to be true indeed! As we drove by today to buy some veggies again, we couldn’t find it. The whole area was cordoned off with 5-6 ft. high fencing and there were bulldozers working to level the area. So much for the green patch in the city!

As I drove back home and sat down in my usual comfy chair, the irony of the situation hit me hard. Here I was, getting sad at losing a romantic tinge of rural life in my otherwise 100% urban life. It didn’t cross my mind to stop and enquire about the family that stayed there. So much for my sensitivity! I hadn’t even bothered to go their more frequently than what I did. I had gladly accepted the freebie thrown in, and I didn’t even come back to give them more earning while they were there.

They were a large family – all living in a house with thatched roof and broken fences, 4-5 kids and 5-6 adults at least – and this was their primary means of livelihood. They were nice people, large-hearted, hard-working and honest, and within a few days/weeks (depending on how much time they were given to vacate), their world turned upside-down. Even though they knew this would happen, they tended to each patch lovingly and excitedly talked about the carrot harvest. I wondered about that harvest – did they manage to reap it? How much money did they lose/earn overall?

I was witnessing urban development stamping out rural life, one plot at a time. Which side was I on?

Image credits: TheTalkingDesk Blog and Wikipedia

A family member: “No, I didn’t. I heard it is an anti-national movie.”

I was shocked by the response! This wasn’t one of those hate-mongering, ultra-nationalists people in abundance in India these days; this was a sober, soft-spoken, family member who genuinely believed what he said.

When the movie Haider released, I wanted to watch it because I wanted to see how well Vishal Bhardwaj did the Hamlet adaptation. When I read about it being ‘sympathetic’ to Muslims and critical of Army, I dismissed it as a fiction created by media for some masala, and still wanted to watch it. When I did watch it, I could understand what those articles meant – it was a narrative different than the usual ones we have heard in mainstream media and writing. I chalked it down again to the over-zealousness of media and Facebook-citizens wanting to create masala. I was glad that I watched the movie, and promptly forgot those Facebook posts and articles.

When I remember the movie (my daughters play the songs of the movie everyday), I don’t remember the narrative that much (fortunately or unfortunately); what I remember is the well-crafted storyline with layered storytelling, super acting, breathtaking cinematography, brilliant music, lyrics and singing, and of course the cleverness with which hamlet storyline has been incorporated.

As Voltaire said, “I do not agree with what you have to say, but I’ll defend to the death your right to say it.” The speaker in this TED video puts it very eloquently, there are dangers in knowing a single story about a region/culture/people. As a nation, if we can’t let multiple stories play out, if we can’t get out of political correctness and let moral correctness play out, we are not going to be a nation worth its name. And we can’t claim to be a nationalist if we behave like ultra-nationalists or ultra-populists.

I am passionate about my country. I take this as my definition of nationalism and this makes me a strong nationalist. And my nationalism is strong and broad enough to understand an alternate narrative; it can tolerate a point of view that is different than mine (even when I don’t agree with it). It can sympathize with those who suffer, without checking their religion or region.

What about you?

अभी पिछले सप्ताह मैं 3-4 हिन्दी magazines खरीद कर लाया। इच्छा थी कि कुछ हिन्दी में पढ़ूँ, और जानूँ कि हिन्दी में क्या लिखा जा रहा है। बीच बीच में मुझे ये बुखार चढ़ जाता है। खैर, magazines थीं ये: पाखी, कथादेश, हंस, और “आहा! जिंदगी।” पढ्न शुरू किया दो-तीन दिन की सुस्ती के बाद। उलट-पलट कर देखा तो बड़ी दिक्कत हुई समझने में। फिर लगा की शायद बड़े दिनों से पढ़ा नहीं है, सो जंग लग गयी होगी मेरी भाषा में, सो थोड़ी मेहनत करके पढ़ ही लेता हूँ कुछ। काफी मशक्कत के बाद 3 कहानियाँ और कुछ कवितायें पढ़ डाली। पढ़ने के बाद काफी निराशा हुई, दो-तीन विचार आए दिमाग में जो यहाँ share करना चाहता हूँ:

1. 10-12 पेज की कहानियाँ थी, पर काफी कमजोर। एक का climax ये था की एक साहब हो बाबा ने कहा, पीना छोड़ दो, फिर उन्हे पता चला बाबा तो गाँजा लेते हैं, तो वे फिर पीने लगे शान से। एक लिव-इन relation की कहानी थी जो बड़े ही predictable अंदाज़ में चलती रही और फिर खतम हो गयी। अच्छी कहानियाँ या तो अपनी भाषा शैली से आपको बांधती हैं, या फिर अपनी विचार-कुसलता से, या फिर क्लाइमैक्स या conflict की गहराई से। कुछ भी बही मुला मुझे इन कहानियों में।
   
2. 2-3 कवितायें पढ़ी पर कुछ समझ नहीं आया! शायद मैं पुरानी अच्छी कविताओं से spoilt हूँ, पर नयी अच्छी कवितायें अवश्य होंगी, ऐसी मेरी आशा है, पर यहाँ कुछ न मिला।
   
3. शब्दों का चयन इन कहानियों में बड़ा विचित्र था – या तो संस्कृत-निष्ठ या फिर इतना देसी कि लोगों को पता ही न चले कि किस प्रांत से आया है। मैं समझता हूँ मेरी भाषा अच्छी है, और शब्द-ज्ञान भी ठीक-ठाक है, अगर मुझे समझने में इतनी दिक्कत हो रही थी तो कई लोगों को समस्या होगी।
   

जब भी मैं हिन्दी की दशा के बारे में सोचता था, ऐसा लगता था कि लोग हिन्दी में लिखते नहीं हैं, इसलिए लोग पढ़ते नहीं है, और इसलिए हिन्दी का प्रचार-प्रसार कम हो रहा है। इसीलिए इतने हिन्दी magazines को देख कर मैं दुकान पर दंग रह गया था।

इसी बीच मैं 2-3 हिन्दी नाटक देखने भी गया, और एक नाटक की किताब भी खरीदी। नाटक-घर छोटा था पर खचा-खच भरा था। किताब पढ़ा तो बड़ी आसानी से समझ आता गया। इसलिए ऐसा नहीं है कि लोग हिन्दी में रुचि नहीं रखते। नाटक की भाषा बिलकुल हिन्दी थी पर बिलकुल आसान। जो magazines मैंने पढे और इन नाटकों की भाषा में गहरा अंतर दिखा, जबकि दोनों हिन्दी हैं। magazine की भाषा ऐसे लगी जैसे victorian इंग्लिश, नाटक की भाषा जैसे मॉडर्न इंग्लिश।

अब लगता है की समस्या ये नहीं है की लेखन नहीं होता, समस्या शायद ये है की भाषा का प्रयोग वैसा नहीं है जैसी लोगों को समझ आए। हर भाषा समय के साथ बदलती है, और बोल-चाल की भाषा और लिखने की भाषा में बहुत ज्यादा अंतर नहीं हो सकता। और जब होता है, तो भाषा के ऊपर विपत्ति आ जाती है। हिन्दी के साथ भी शायद यही समस्या है। मुझे लगता है हिन्दी को भी आवश्यकता है चेतन भगत जैसे लेखक कि जिसने इंग्लिश क्लाससिक्स की दुनिया में भले जगह नहीं बनाई हो, पर जन-मानस में और लाखों युवाओं को पुस्तक-प्रेमी बना दिया, ऐसे युवा भी, जिनको आप कहीं से भी इंग्लिश-एक्सपेर्ट नहीं मान सकते।

आपके क्या विचार हैं?

My recent reconnect with theatre scene in Delhi was enabled by Asmita Theatre Group and their 2-month long summer festival. If you are in Delhi, do check out Asmita’s plays, they are in the last leg of their Summer Theatre festival and I can guarantee you will not be disappointed at the experience!

I was introduced to plays in 2000 (or around that time). 4 years into my career, at the height of dot-com boom, I was back in Delhi after my first stint in US and had time on my hands as I was figuring out how to set up my own company. One day, I don’t remember why, we went to India Habitat Centre, 2-3 of us, to watch a play “Final Solutions”. We were led to a basement hall in IHC where I was sitting in the 3^rd or 4^th row, and it was amazing to see the actors from up close. We went again after a few weeks, and this time we sat in the front row. It was even more amazing – seeing the actor right in front of me, performing with a finesse, but also with the fragility of a live performance – I was praying they don’t forget a line or miss a cue! I was hooked.

We watched 3-4 plays during those couple of months and they left an indelible stamp on me. All of these happened to be Asmita Theatre Group‘s plays but the name never registered, only the experience.

Life pulled me away from Delhi to Hyderabad, then to US, China, and back to US. After spending 12 years outside Delhi, we came back to Delhi in 2012 – me, my wife and 2 adorable daughters. I had the dreams of building my own business (again!), I also had a slight hope that I would reconnect to my past – reliving that experience of watching a performance up so close. I was going back to same set of friends who accompanied me to theatre those few weeks in 2000. However, 12 years is a very long time – it had taken a toll on all of us. We were all family men, or company men, and had too many important and urgent things to worry about to revive an old interest. Sure enough, we talked about it sometime, but we never took any step in that direction.

This summer of 2014, everything changed. A few friends (and families) and we went on a vacation to mountains together. With kids giving company to kids, and ladies engaging each other, we had some time to reflect on life and pursuits we had left as we built careers and family – poetry reading and writing, theatre, debating passionately about topics of our country, politics and technology. That conversation sparked a desire to relive some of those, and some plans were made. Nothing concrete, but stirrings were there.

Two weeks later, with families going to parents’ houses, it so happened that 2 of us found ourselves home alone on one Sunday! I tried finding what the best outing could be and we zoomed in on a play in IHC Amphitheatre, which again happened to be Asmita’s. I was so surprised to see Asmita still in existence – I never thought theatre groups could live so long!

The designated time arrived and we landed in IHC, with many nostalgic memories. As we watched their pre-play ‘nukkad natak’, I saw a familiar face walking around – white beard, half-shirt, smiling, and a brisk walk that suggested confidence. It took a few minutes and a few glances around to realize this was Mr. Arvind Gaur, the iconic resident director of Asmita. And then I remembered seeing him in 2000. I was again surprised – how can the group stay for so long, AND with the director being same all along!

The play was Chukayenge? Nahi, and we were in for a treat. It was a house-full show, I was in the second row and thoroughly enjoyed the show, again getting mesmerized by the proximity to the real actor and real acts. Films have dulled our senses so much, we don’t realize how powerful real performance can be if we let it come in. The lead lady looked familiar, but she was too young to be in the plays we saw in 2000. She was speaking at the top of her voice all the time (which I later realized, is what you have to do if you do nukkad natak and when performing in open air theatres). She was a marvelous actor, and when the show was over, I strained my ears to catch her name, Shilpi Marwaha – I made a mental note to Google her up. Arvind Gaur mentioned a few actors had worked in Ranjhaana movie and that made me realize why I had liked that movie so much – it had a very theatre feel to it.

While walking out, actors were lined up and personally thanking us for coming! Really? Can actors be so humble? I don’t visualize Shahrukh Khan within 10 kms of the theatre I watch his movies! I congratulated Shilpi on her performance and her voice was so hoarse I could barely hear her, but I was so awed by me talking to an actress whose performance I saw just now, that it didn’t matter what she said to me. It was late in the night by the time we went back home and I crashed in the bed knowing I had one of the best days of my life in years.

Early morning next day, suddenly I remembered why Shilpi Marwaha looked familiar: she too had worked in Ranjhaana; as Abhay Deol’s sister and Sonam Kapoor’s friend! I picked up the phone and let my friend know this, all excited!

Then the irony of it struck me – it was as if I was legitimizing her claim to acting ability by showing she worked in a movie – a movie where her role was much smaller compared to what I had seen last night, and where she was paired with a lead actress whose acting abilities are not worth commenting.

I was embarrassed; while I wanted to put the blame on movies killing theatre, I realized no one had stopped me from engaging more with the theatre scene all this while – I had killed my sense of arts, culture and creativity. If anyone was to blame, it was me. And it was time for me to change myself.

Thanks to Asmita Theatre Group, I can do so now. I have decided to try my best to reconnect with the theatre scene in Delhi, and reconnect to myself. I don’t want to kill my sensibilities anymore, I want to live a richer life. I am taking my daughters on this journey; I don’t want them to stay ignorant of such a fine form of art and expression. I definitely don’t want them to hold me or my generation responsible for letting this art form wither away.

Together, we have watched 2 plays now – Log-Baag, and Ek Maamoli Aadmi. While my younger one (5 yr.) had trouble sitting through Ek Maamoli Aadmi (it was decidedly more sombre than Log-Baag which she liked), I was happy watching her staying engaged most of the time and not wanting to walk out (which she has done with movies). I am sure a right selection of plays will keep her glued. My elder one has been enjoying these so far.

I was also intrigued by who these actors are – what do they do in their daily life, what brings them to theatre. I wanted to know them better, given I had shaken hands with so many of them and had been thoroughly entertained by them. I started researching them (thanks to Google and their facebook pages). I now have another story to tell about Asmita and its actors that will form my next post in this series.

I read with extreme shock this morning’s newspaper account of a doctor and his 5 yr. old daughter crushed to death by a speeding bus. While I am getting desensitized by constant barrage of news about accidental deaths, this was more shocking for 2 reasons:

1. They were nowhere close to the road and still were killed by a bus.
2. I stand with my daughter every day outside my apartment complex, my wife does the same for our younger one.

This was more jarring, and bone-chilling for me, and I am sure for thousands of parents who drop their kids to school bus stop outside their complex.

I am still in shock and anger, and trying to figure out what I can do with this anger, and also why I am so angry and shocked.

I think my anger stems from the fact that apart from this being the tragedy of the worst kind, I know this will be just added to the statistic of pedestrian accident and it won’t move the needle on improving safety for others. TOI already has the tally ready, 42 pedestrians thus far in Gurgaon.

This is really the rapid urbanization impact where the focus has been on delivering what the businesses and vested interests need, rather than what the guy in the street needs. This reminds me of couple of lines from a poem Ramdhari Singh Dinkar wrote (about nuclear bomb as a weapon):

…

झड़ चुके पूंछ, रोमांत झड़े, पशुता का झड़ना बाकी है,

बाहर बाहर तन सँवर चुका, मन अभी संवरना बाकी है।

(Tail and hairs have fallen off, animal-behavior is yet to do so,

The body has spruced up from outside , the soul inside is yet to do so.)

I wonder what can be done to take back the control of our life (and death) from those who peddle urbanization in the name of progress.

Maybe RWA of housing complexes can take the lead and start reclaiming the area around their complex and control the traffic, law and order, and general well-being – and demand money and service from the local government to do so effectively?

Maybe we can demand our schools to have buses that have responsible, empathetic drivers and conductors (I have seen rash driving from school buses too, sarkari buses are not the only ones to blame)?

Maybe we can force stringent punishments on traffic violators who cause death (the driver in question was caught and then released on bail, not sure what kind of deterrent we are creating for the next offender)?

Or maybe we can just leave it at that, and treat them as collateral damage of the rush to urbanize so fast, to benefit so few.

Image: freedigitalphotos.net

Finally, I paid him Rs. 100/- and walked away, angry at myself for having paid this guy rather than doing the right thing, and then trying to console myself that I was just trying to optimize for the value of my time. My daughter informed me that she would report me to Arvind Kejriwal!

I have heard this story before, in Gurgaon, that we don’t accept cash payments so you have to give your driving license and come pay for the challan. I haven’t had such an experience in Delhi, but in Hyderabad, I have had couple of experiences where I could pay in cash and get a proper receipt of the payment. So this rule of not accepting cash is not universal. I don’t know why some of these governments persist with such an arcane rule in this world of technology. I can think of couple of reasons why cash is not allowed:

1. Carrying too much cash by the police is a problem
2. It exposes the system to frauds like fraud challan-book (so I pay but govt. doesn’t receive the money).

And the reason some form of original document is kept is to ensure I indeed turn up and pay.

However, these problems have been solved in so many different ways by technology. Here are a few solutions from top of the mind:

1. Use a device which generates the receipt (and keeps the data for later analysis) rather than use paper receipt and collect cash.
2. Use a software to track defaulters who don’t pay rather than keeping a physical document in possession
3. Use a pre-paid system – I can buy a smartcard where I fill in money and pay for challan through that (police needs to have a smart card reader with them when they fine me)
4. Use a Point-of-Sales system – I can pay by credit/debit card instead of cash

Important question though is this: Who is supposed to fix this?? Are they listening, scouting for solution? How does one reach them?

Image: freedigitalphotos.net

Interesting thing was what happened after it. I heard the thud, when a red Maruti assumed I would turn towards expressway and I went straight, and hit my car from right side. First thought that crossed my mind was that I may be delayed for the meeting. Second thought was a perennial thought: what is the expected (and realistic) thing to do when you get hit, should I ignore and proceed, stop and shout, call traffic police, or something else? When I looked at the driver of that car, he seemed to be muttering something, seemed a little angry too. I was in the middle of a mini-jam, so stopping would have meant a bigger jam. After a moment of hesitation, the other driver continued to drive and raced towards expressway, staring at me all the while as if I caused the accident. An auto driver continued to look at me and smile. I had no choice but continue to drive out of that circle, wondering about the extent of the damage. I stopped 100 meters ahead to inspect the damage. It wasn’t much, but very visible and very red (since the other car was red).

As luck would have it, a few days later, very close to the same place, an auto grazed me while trying to overtake from left, causing another dent. He didn’t bother to slow down or check what happened, he continued on.

When I put myself in their shoes (the auto driver and the car driver), I understand their reaction: there isn’t much to do in these cases – you are too cynical of traffic police to call them (or attract their attention), insurance is not an issue most of the time because you are fine carrying such bruises on your car, you are not sure what the other person would do – he might be a goon with a gun or knife, or a hot-headed guy who thinks all problems are solved by shouting and hurling abuses. Given such a gloomy outlook, safest bet is to ignore and move on, wish that the damage wasn’t large, and hope that the other guy takes the incident in the same way.

This may very well be the best approach when the accidents are minor, but such a response may be problematic when they are major. However, responses stay the same – we are too cynical of police (rightfully so maybe), we are too wary of the other guy, and we are too afraid of the possible outcomes.

Image: freedigitalphotos.net

I went to a restaurant the other night, and after we were done eating and gulping down large portions of saunf and sugar cubes, I gave my debit card for paying the bill, as usual. The waiter mumbled something. When I inquired, I realized he was asking for my PIN so that he could put it in his machine rather than bothering me with it!! I told him he could bring the swipe machine to me (most of these devices are wireless these days) when it is time for the PIN, but he said they don’t have the wireless one. I offered to walk up to his cashier when needed, but he wasn’t too comfortable with the idea.

I was shocked that he thought asking for the PIN was normal business and nothing unusual! The comfort with which he was poised with a pen to write my PIN suggested that he does this with everyone, and with some success. My sister-in-law mentioned that apparently this has become normal (giving PIN), his friend did the same the other day at Subway!

So much for the safety RBI wants to provide – if people are so lazy (or ignorant) about such a sensitive piece of data, no one can save them – if you hand over your ATM card and the PIN to a waiter in the mall, you are inviting trouble and tempting an otherwise honest guy!

Anyway, I gave the waiter my credit card instead. He came back in a minute and said this one also needed PIN! So I walked up to that tucked-in-a-corner machine surrounded by the kitchen staffers who were surprised to see me there; the cashier was fumbling with the card, and finally he told me the transaction went through without PIN (obviously!).